View Profile swaenK

32, Male


Everywhere, all the time

Joined on 8/9/03

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swaenK's News

Posted by swaenK - 9 days ago

ballzinga I'm waiting on some terrible east Indian to pay me the money he owes me in full and he's hiding it out trying to avoid responsibility. So what I've done is... I've corralled everyone I know into eating beef on the regular. Specifically in the neighborhood he lives in cuz east indians revere cows and this will send him a serious message that I have peeps in my corner and we aren't going to take his selfishness lightly. Burger King, Wendy's, Arby's, I've convinced people to even get their dogs in on this massacre. The higher ups, the big wigs in the commercial sector will hear about this when they see all their cows disappear and likely lend a helping hand in making this dirty man have a hard time sleeping at night...

In other news I bought another cheap ass Samsung and I'm happy with er. She is light and fresh. Cozy and comfy, simple and efficient. I mean its not as organized as my old iPhone but it's cheap and happy

Posted by swaenK - August 5th, 2020

It is blocked by almost all WiFi hotspots. Frustrating as I recently deleted facebook. Deleting Facebook has made me feel so much smarter. Truly. Now I am not squinting over completely random updates from a hundred different sources at all times of the day. Facebook isn’t healthy. I am a liberated human, untethered from the harsh confines of my story feed.

holy f#ck no sooner did I say that then this:


Posted by swaenK - January 26th, 2020

When I was a wee lad when I watched this movie for some reason it caused a seriously powerful emotional response. I don't quite get it now, but at the time this movie was... just beautiful. :\


Posted by swaenK - November 5th, 2019

I am a morbid person. I've almost died a few times... death is very slow. It is an instant goodbye that drifts by slowly. If you're very lucky it will just keep fucking going and pass you right by. If you're not lucky it will strike instantly and you will be eternally lost.

There is the ultra slow death tho that's totally different. Where death holds you and cradles you and slowly over a great time you waste away. I've never come close to this. I am a retarded adrenaline junkie. Not a quadrapalegic.

So I am trying to do the impossible. As far as I know I've done some impossible things up to this point so I repeat for the thousandth fucking time this should be the fucking easy part fuck sakes you stupid fuck people.

I merely want to suck your daughter's/sister's blood. Seriously fuck

Posted by swaenK - October 17th, 2019

That new redesign is spiffy.

I am at ends with some expressions of individuality at times though because it may conflict with another person's perception of themselves and others.

A person should always be able to express themselves but how they express their vision is quite important. I personally envision NG becoming something much more gigantic than it currently is or was.

We live in a new time, that seems like an oxymoron because time is always "new" but society accepts more now than it has ever. Our ability to condone our views has significantly improved since the 1950s but our ability to hate hasn't decreased.

We use to hate the publicist who spoke his opinion but now the publicist is hating people who do not condone his views it is almost a backwards cycle.

Anyway my design theology is that if a person has taken the time to make a beautiful design, something new, something mature, something edgy and free from tarnished history, while any design doesnt last forever, that design can always be used again and again elsewhere. Say, another painting of a different subject that people could view more objectively. These paintings get massive attention and that is because humans are driven beings that do not waste time

But in time what do you want to see? What do you want to show your friends and family? More or less? You can't have your cake and eat it too.

You can however open a store that sells cake.


Posted by swaenK - August 28th, 2019

This was a career suicide moment. I was eating a free meal at the salvation army picknick. Free food for people who use the salvation army services. While I was receiving food one of the annoying chaplains not one of the cool ones snapped a pic while I was grabbing a burger. They really wanted a photo of one of the staff members but I was right in there. If that ever goes global I am done for... pathetic

Posted by swaenK - June 20th, 2019

I just seen the billion dollar cocaine bust in Philly Pensylvania. Looks like our dear leader Tom Fulp is going away for a long time :(

Whatever will happen to Newgrounds? Fuck

Posted by swaenK - January 19th, 2019

okay, so I am still sick. the first run of antibiotics werent strong enough and as soon as I stopped taking them the infection came back hurtling into my life painfully.  :(

so I am on new stronger antibiotics now... 

Posted by swaenK - December 29th, 2018

4 weeks, or something, this cold has been going on for. I am going to the doctor I think to get anti-biotics. Lazy, easy fix. Sue me. Fkkkkk beeeinnnnggg siiiiickckkkck

mission: success. I got apo-mometasone nasal spray and amoxacillin ffuu yes. 

Posted by swaenK - December 24th, 2018

So there are some good things that come out of jail. I have been trying to do polyphasic sleeping for years, but it turns out being trapped in a small area with all the time to sleep/do whatever you want in the world, makes it easy to do polyphasic sleeping. 

Now it has been said that women naturally adapt to polyphasic sleeping easier than men, and I think I know why now. It's not like they're really that different from us mentally, per se. I think it's because they're like cats and they're always conserving energy. While guys are always pushing themselves. We work ourselves tired and sleep in as late as possible, basically. 

While women, like cats, like to conserve energy and beauty rest, w/e. While in jail I was able to focus on my polyphasic napping. I didn't stress myself out, because if I did I would go into a state of starvation. You're always saving energy in jail basically. Unless you're rolling in canteen. When I ran out of canteen though I was too tired to polyphasic sleep/failure. It's kind of hard/tiring. 

But anyway, there are some secret methods that I cannot specifically reveal as a kung fu master doesn't reveal all of his tricks online. He teaches students privately if they wish to learn from the master. 

N E WAY: I polyphasic slept for about 4 months near the end of my sentence, and halfway through around easter when I was rollin' [per se] before I ran out of canteen I was able to do a perfect flip. Taking a nap mid-day for about an hour and a half or so, and a nap around the evening, which I would then wake up at like midnight if I flipped right. 2 hour nap at night. Now I got this amount of sleep consistently. 

In doing so I was able to perfectly balance my hormonal flow. When you sleep for large chunks your hormones fail/w/e. But if you only briefly take breaks you don't lose your bodies "flow". Normally I would do polyphasic sleeping for the dreams, but this time around I had an astronomical breakthrough where I felt like I was on MDMA and LSD at the same time. 

It was unbelievable. My brain was able to produce chemicals near similar to being on extremely fancy triptamines. It was extremely euphoric and peaceful, and extremely clean as it was drug free. 

Mind = Blown. 

You can't do this on the outs because a) you have to go to work b) you cant take naps at work c) you're tired when you're done work. It's veritably impossible. But while in jail you can achieve very fantastic nap cycles [unless you're so hungry you can't function/operate]. 

True story. Don't be lazy. Stay up. Do jumping jacks to stay awake. ETC. 

Polyphasic sleeping for the simple man: nap like a cat. Don't sleep in large chunks at night. Go to bed at 10:00 pm. Wake up at midnight. Or as early as you can. No large chunks of sleep. It IS possible to sleep fantastically for 20 minutes, but it's hard.